Moving to a New State has Taught Me More Than I Could Have Ever Imagined
I’m moving again, and no not for the last time.
I’m emotionally and physically exhausted. Sometimes things are hidden so well on social media.
4 places in 5 months.
I couldn’t have imagined this being my reality if you had asked me what my future looked like in the beginning of 2021. Actually, in the beginning of 2021 I thought deep down inside that I’d be renewing my Chicago apartment lease.
Oh, how wrong I was.
This year was nothing short of unexpected, and it’s not over yet.
I’ve cried a lot, a lot more than anyone knows about, and honestly, I’ll probably cry some more.
I’ve been incredibly vulnerable, honest, and true to myself. I’ve poured my heart out and have had it smashed to pieces. I’ve learned some incredibly difficult lessons. I understand the value of time spent with someone, when to hold my tongue and listen, and when to speak up if I’m uncomfortable. I’ve learned what I want out of my life, who I want to be, and what I will no longer tolerate. I’ve started therapy and learned mourning my old life is normal. I’ve grown and changed but still pieces of me remain the same.
I’ve learned I don’t like who I am when I’m drunk.
I’ve learned I love the way a paperback book feels like childhood.
I’ve learned that my mom is my rock.
That my day is better when I start my mornings off with a workout.
I love coffee with the creamer, and I don’t care if it’s the unhealthier choice.
Cooking a delicious meal for myself is worth the hour it takes me to chop the vegetables.
I’ve learned that this blog relates to others and that small community of support helps me too.
I’ve learned that being outside in nature brings me peace.
I’ve learned more within the last 311 days then I think I would have in my entire lifetime in Illinois.
I’m still learning, I’m still moving.
And I won’t stop until I’ve accomplished exactly what I said I would.
Because I’ve learned, I deserve everything I’ve ever wanted.
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